God knows that I have!
I'm trudging along and doing well...for the most part. I had a major guilty feeling yesterday after I ate some Papa John's pizza for lunch. My work provided pizza for everyone as a "Thank You" for hard work during a crazy busy time. I had an internal pep talk with myself. I told myself all morning that I was going to be good and eat my Lean Cuisine. However, once the pizza got there, I just couldn't say no. I have to say it was delicious but it also made me feel like crap after I ate it. My stomach was definitely not happy with me!
Yes, I realize that you have to treat yourself every now and then.
Yes, I realize that one bad meal choice doesn't mean that all is lost.
BUT...like I said before, food is my drug. It was like putting alcohol in front of an alcoholic and expecting them not to drink. I was really frustrated with myself because I knew that I needed to make the better choice and I didn't.
That being said, I didn't let that lapse in eating judgement throw me off track and I ate the way I was supposed to for the rest of the day...including drinking a ridiculous amount of water. Seriously like 100 ounces of water. I told my co-workers that I was going to move my office into the bathroom because I felt like I was going pee every 10 minutes. Sorry - TMI. I feel really good. Better than I've felt in a long time. I didn't realize just how bad eating crappy food made me feel.
I want to start exercising but I have to confess that I'm afraid. Going to the gym is absolutely out of the question - at least for right now. I have a hard enough time just going out in public right now and getting my exercise on in a public place would definitely send me into a panic attack....and it might frighten any small children that happen to see me. I mean, I have 42DDD boobs and there isn't a sports bra out there that can keep those things in control while I'm hoofing it on the treadmill. I have a treadmill at the house so my plan is to start slowly. I can't do too much at a time because my feet go numb after about 15 minutes or so. I'm hoping that will subside as my weight goes down. So for now I'm focusing on moving forward - one day at a time. I'm pushing through the frustration and discouragement that I sometimes feel and keeping my eyes focused on the end goal of 100 pounds gone!
Baby Steps. Slow and steady wins the race.
I told you I wanted to introduce you to my friend who also lost 100 pounds. If you want to "meet" her on Fb let me know. She says she would love to in any way help you out or anything she can do, says she talks about her plan all the time.
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way about some bad food ... guilt sets in and My stomach also let's me know about it too.
And look girl. whenever I go to the gym, I feel very self conscious too. DON'T. I never look at other people to see if I'm doing better than them or whatever it is I think I should be embarrassed about. If I happen to notice anyone, I just think "Oh good job" or sometimes a "get it girl" pops in my head but then I go on and I never think about that person again. I'm seriously trying to think if any ONE person pops out in my head .... no... not really.