Well it's been another week on my journey. The previous week, I lost 1/2 a pound bringing me to a total of 17 lbs lost. Only 3 more pounds to go until I meet my next goal!!
This week, however, I didn't lose anything...but I didn't gain either...so while I'm not super pumped, I'm happy that I at least maintained my weight from the week before.
John and I started exercising this week by doing P90x. Although it may seem a bit ambitious to be taking on a monster like P90x at the size I am, I have to say I've been impressed with myself. Obviously I can't do every single move they do but I do as much as I can and, on the ones that I can't do all the way, I try to do it as close as I can. We've exercised for at least an hour every night this week (except for last night) and I've felt pretty good. After the first day, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to move but surprisingly, I wasn't as sore as I expected to be. Now I know there are a few of you out there that are thinking "muscle weighs more than fat so you may lose inches but not weight" - yes, I know that...BUT it would have been nice to see a little bit of a reward via the scale.
I feel like I've just been trudging along this week and I had a hard time staying focused on my goal of getting healthy. I did have an extra Diet Coke two days this week but I still ate like I was supposed to. Tuesday was one of those days that it was a total struggle to even get out of bed and function. That's the frustrating thing about depression - I'll be going along fine and then out of nowhere, it will blindside me. In most cases, as with this one, there is no particular "thing" that triggers it. The only way that I know to describe it is the chemical imbalance in my head is a little more imbalanced a that particular time than others and my meds can't quite get it in check. I put on my brave face and headed out face the world and managed to make it through the day...and thankfully the rest of the week was better. Depression is not a weakness, it's a disease. I am not ashamed of who I am. I don't talk about my feelings for attention or for you to feel sorry for me. I am so open about my feelings in hopes that someone out there who may be going through the same thing will realize that they are not alone...that they are not "broken"...that it's ok to ask for help...and that they can get through it.
So here's to another week. I will not give up. I will not fail. I don't care if it takes me years to lose this weight, I WILL do it! Baby steps. Slow and steady wins the race.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Happy Dance
This week, although busy and a little stressful, has had a couple of fabulous "mini-victories" for me.
First, I lost 2.5 pounds this week bringing my total weight loss so far to 16.5 pounds!
Second, I was able to comfortably put on a pair of pants that I haven't been able to wear in almost 2 years - and they were the next size smaller than what I had been wearing!!
Talk about a renewed sense of motivation! If it feels this good now to go down one pants size, I can't imagine what it's going to feel like when I go down to the next size, or the next. But I am determined to get there! I'm not going to give up!
I want to give a shout out (yeah, I know that sounds totally cheesy) to my fabulous husband. He's been on this journey with me and by my side step-by-step. So far, he lost 23 pounds!! He's been there for me to lean on when I get frustrated and give me encouragement when I need it. We're getting healthy together and it feels wonderful!
Tonight my family is going out to dinner to celebrate my Dad's birthday. I'm not going to go absolutely crazy but I'm not going to beat myself up either if I eat a few more calories tonight than the usual. It's a special occasion so I may treat myself just a little. :)
Baby steps. Slow and steady wins the race.
First, I lost 2.5 pounds this week bringing my total weight loss so far to 16.5 pounds!
Second, I was able to comfortably put on a pair of pants that I haven't been able to wear in almost 2 years - and they were the next size smaller than what I had been wearing!!
Talk about a renewed sense of motivation! If it feels this good now to go down one pants size, I can't imagine what it's going to feel like when I go down to the next size, or the next. But I am determined to get there! I'm not going to give up!
I want to give a shout out (yeah, I know that sounds totally cheesy) to my fabulous husband. He's been on this journey with me and by my side step-by-step. So far, he lost 23 pounds!! He's been there for me to lean on when I get frustrated and give me encouragement when I need it. We're getting healthy together and it feels wonderful!
Tonight my family is going out to dinner to celebrate my Dad's birthday. I'm not going to go absolutely crazy but I'm not going to beat myself up either if I eat a few more calories tonight than the usual. It's a special occasion so I may treat myself just a little. :)
Baby steps. Slow and steady wins the race.
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Same Place
At this week's weigh-in, I didn't lose any weight BUT I didn't gain any either.
I will admit I was disappointed at first but after thinking about it for a minute, I snapped out of it. Yeah, it would have been great to lose a pound or two but at least I didn't gain anything. I realize that there will be weeks that my body just doesn't cooperate and I'm just going to have to accept that. If I don't, I'll get frustrated and give up. I keep reminding myself that (as annoying as this phrase is to me) I didn't gain it all over night and it's not going to come off overnight either. I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing and keep focused on the end goal.
With Spring approaching, it's going to be time to put away the long sleeves and jeans for capris and short sleeves. I loathe new seasons because it means new clothes. While I have a few "staple" items that I turn to, I like to try and find a couple of new ones to brighten up my wardrobe. Shopping is frustrating to me because there are only a handful of places that carry plus size clothing in store so I can try it on. And of those that do carry plus size clothes, a lot of them carry what I would consider to be "grandma" clothes. Do these people not realize that there are fat girls under the age of 60? Seriously. It irritates me that because I don't fit the "ideal" size, I either have to deal with a very limited selection in store or I have to shop online and just hope what I ordered looks good on me. Come on people...I'm fat, I don't have a disease. I'm not going to infect your store with fatness so it would be awesome if you would carry some stuff for me to wear that doesn't look like I bought it at Grandmas R Us or at the tent and awning store. And, just for the record, I'm a big fan of the phrase "just because they make it in your size doesn't mean you should wear it." No, Old Navy, I do not need shorts that are Daisy Dukes. Quite frankly, I wouldn't be caught dead in them. For one, I have more self-respect than to walk out in public with all my flab and cellulite flapping in the wind for everyone to see. Oh, and thanks for the skinny jeans...because putting on those skinny jeans will totally make my fat look skinny, right? NOPE! Not that I have anything against people who wear Daisy Duke's or skinny jeans but surely you see where I'm coming from on this one.
So for now, I'm going to keep moving forward because I know one day that I WILL be able to buy clothes from the regular section in ANY store I want! Baby steps. Slow and steady wins the race.
I will admit I was disappointed at first but after thinking about it for a minute, I snapped out of it. Yeah, it would have been great to lose a pound or two but at least I didn't gain anything. I realize that there will be weeks that my body just doesn't cooperate and I'm just going to have to accept that. If I don't, I'll get frustrated and give up. I keep reminding myself that (as annoying as this phrase is to me) I didn't gain it all over night and it's not going to come off overnight either. I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing and keep focused on the end goal.
With Spring approaching, it's going to be time to put away the long sleeves and jeans for capris and short sleeves. I loathe new seasons because it means new clothes. While I have a few "staple" items that I turn to, I like to try and find a couple of new ones to brighten up my wardrobe. Shopping is frustrating to me because there are only a handful of places that carry plus size clothing in store so I can try it on. And of those that do carry plus size clothes, a lot of them carry what I would consider to be "grandma" clothes. Do these people not realize that there are fat girls under the age of 60? Seriously. It irritates me that because I don't fit the "ideal" size, I either have to deal with a very limited selection in store or I have to shop online and just hope what I ordered looks good on me. Come on people...I'm fat, I don't have a disease. I'm not going to infect your store with fatness so it would be awesome if you would carry some stuff for me to wear that doesn't look like I bought it at Grandmas R Us or at the tent and awning store. And, just for the record, I'm a big fan of the phrase "just because they make it in your size doesn't mean you should wear it." No, Old Navy, I do not need shorts that are Daisy Dukes. Quite frankly, I wouldn't be caught dead in them. For one, I have more self-respect than to walk out in public with all my flab and cellulite flapping in the wind for everyone to see. Oh, and thanks for the skinny jeans...because putting on those skinny jeans will totally make my fat look skinny, right? NOPE! Not that I have anything against people who wear Daisy Duke's or skinny jeans but surely you see where I'm coming from on this one.
So for now, I'm going to keep moving forward because I know one day that I WILL be able to buy clothes from the regular section in ANY store I want! Baby steps. Slow and steady wins the race.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)